Need weaning tips!!!

[MarshaZepeda]

Okay, so my 10 month old seriously needs to be weaned! Please help me out and give me tips!
Here's a lil background info: When he was newborn, we had a tough time. He wouldn't latch on very well so I was very scabby and bleeding and HURTING the whole time he had to nurse. I CRIED every time it was time to nurse. BUT I was determined. While reading online for tips, I read that he shouldn't have a binky or bottle until he had the hang of it so I took it ALL away and only offered him myself so that we could get used to it. Um... so 6 weeks later, we finally were on the way to healing and had finally gotten the hang of it. But he was NOT interested in the bottle or binky AT ALL anymore. Fine, no biggy. One less thing to wean him of later right? WRONG! Omg... he is wearing me out! *I'M* his stinkin pacifier, lol! He will not sleep unless I'm right next to him and available ALL NIGHT LONG..... :crazy: I am exhausted. I wish he would take a paci at this point but I've spent over $50 on diff ones for him and he HATES them. I've also bought 5 diff types of bottles and cups to no avail... *sigh*
HELP ME. LOL!
Any tips/ideas on how to get him to sleep/comfort himself on his own?

[Charla]

None from me...I'm still nursing both girls ;)

Sorry to hear things have been so difficult though.
You know, when Bekah was born DH read "The Sleep Book" by Dr. Sears and got some fantastic advice for helping Jasmine create new sleep patterns that didn't involve nursing down. She cried for a couple weeks (in his arms, not alone in her bed) but now goes to sleep beautifully. So I'd recommend that strongly :)

[sinead]

Yeah, I'd get your DH to start doing the back to sleep part after he nurses. He might fall asleep nursing, but pass him over to your DH anyway. He will probably cry, but that's just because he's getting used to something new. Your DH will feel like super duper awesome dad because he'll be able to get him to sleep (and it'll make up for being up more for a little bit). Once you get him used to going to sleep with your DH instead of nursing, then your DH can work on putting him down in the crib instead of holding him until he falls asleep.

I went through just what you describe with Maggie and ended up forcing her to wean at 2, so with Katie I got DH involved in the sleep process early. We're getting fairly close to weaning completely, too, and DH is going to have to start taking over part of the night routine again (something he's dreading but willing to do because he knows it's for the best).

((hugs)) It's not the easiest thing to do, but it'll probably go easier than you think.

[MarshaZepeda]

*sigh*

This is where dh and I are butting heads. He thinks that I'm just trying to pass off my responsibility to him. AND he's not even home during the week anyways. He only sleeps here on fri and sat (and sometimes on thursdays...) I've had a couple of ppl tell me to just "put him in the crib and let him cry it out"... :26: I CAN NOT do that..... I've never been too good at that. I feel so guilty!

[crazygirl]

awwwwwww so sorry chickie.. I went through this too! I had to quit cold turkey with 2 of my kiddos.. It sucked but after 2 days and only one sleepless night... everything was fine... good luck!
about putting them in the crib and letting them cry it out... i've done both..
when i quit cold turkey with my oldest we just cuddled she kept asking for "IT", I kept saying no, it's all gone, and we'd both cry on the couch.. we did that for 2 days. i tried to keep her busy during the day so she wasn't interested in nursing.. running to the zoo, and the mall etc etc. so she'd fall asleep in the car so i wouldn't have to nurse her to sleep.

my 3rd son, i swore i'd do it different. i still quit cold turkey but i let him cry it out in the crib. he never cried more then 10 minutes, and never asked to nurse. i did nurse him the middle of the night the second night only to relieve all the pressure i'd built up and i was dying.. ROFL after that we were good. i totally preferred the second weaning then the first..
i nurse linney till she was 2
the boys till they were each 1
and jenna till she was almost 2
loved it
loved not being tied to it anymore either... rofl!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[taracamille]

With all three of mine, I let them cry a little longer each time. Not just when trying to wean either, my son wanted me all the time and I just let him cry for 2 mins at a time, then 3 then 4 and so on. It really made my heart ache to hear him cry and I even cried the whole time too, but it worked! Hope you figure out something and get some rest soon.

[Charla]

I could never let mine cry it out. I don't have the thick skin!!
And I have stubborn girls who wouldn't give up, so I'm glad I'm not planning on doing it that way!

[MarshaZepeda]

I could never let mine cry it out. I don't have the thick skin!!
And I have stubborn girls who wouldn't give up, so I'm glad I'm not planning on doing it that way!
Ugh... I'm soooooooo NOT thick skinned either, lol! And my kids are stubborn, too. The few times that they had to cry it out, it took FOREVER for them to give it up. (These are times that I'm NOT around or we're in the car or something...) So it makes it really, really hard for me to leave them with anyone b/c I feel bad for whoever has to watch them... :26:

[Charla]

Marsha, I know exactly what you mean. Rebekah cried ALL the way home from my parents' one day (it's a 70-minute drive). We did leave her with MIL/FIL for our date last week, for the first time, but she was okay because her big sister was with her.

I hope you find some way to make it work without too much pain for either of you!

[sinead]

When we had to let Katie cry (part of her getting used to DH putting her down to bed), I had to go to the other side of the house and sometimes outside. Other times I'd just sit in the living room and listen to her cry while I cried my own eyes out.

By the way, you SO aren't passing off the responsibility by asking him to get involved in the going to bed deal. I understand that it's a moot point, anyway, since he's not there duing the week, but there are two parents in your house and nowhere I've ever read says that it's the mother's job (and only the mother's job) to get the children to sleep. Nowhere. I do most of the bedtime/nighttime stuff here (but that's mostly because DH is an engineer working with high voltage electricity and being too sleepy at work could be deadly for him), but DH definitely steps up and helps out. (((hugs))) girl! I hope you get it worked out.